Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Done. Done annnd Done.

Tonight I am feeling incredibly overwhelmed, stressed and at my max limit of life. Last night I was on the verge of an anxiety attack. I haven't felt this way in a while. I stopped by Sprouts grocery store and picked up some all natural Anxiety Relief. I need these things to work a little faster.

I am stressed about finding a new place to live in our price range. It's not looking good.

I'm stressed about school. I'm slacking in my class. I have four classes left and I just want it to be done NOW. I can't wait until March.

I'm stressed about my friendships. They all seem to be lacking right now. I'm tired of feeling like I have no friends. I'm tired of stressing about friendships. This is an area of my life that is greatly lacking, and it's really taking it's toll on me.

I'm stressed about the future. Things I have no control over. The "unknown" scares me and stresses me out.

I'm stressed about having a baby. It isn't going as easily as I had hoped. I hate this. I hate seeing announcement after announcement. I hate knowing I'm not going to get pregnant until I go to the Dr. and find out what is wrong with my body. But I hate my insurance and doctor so much that I'm waiting until January when our insurance changes. In the meantime I just sit hear, longing to be pregnant.

I need a stiff drink. I want nothing more than to spend a whole day sewing, but that's not going to happen. I want to spend a whole day with my husband, but between our jobs and football, that isn't going to happen for at least 15 weeks.

I'm exhausted and I can't get enough sleep. I just want 12 hours of sleep. I want to go to bed early, but that's time I could be spending with Travis, so instead I stay up late and wake up a raging bitch the next morning.

I'm just over it right now. I want to cry and crawl in a hole for a few days and come back out once this shitty phase is over. Hopefully soon enough it will be.


  1. Even though I already have a baby, I know how you feel. My body decided to "reset" itself after my pregnancy and I have not had a period in 14 months. Blah.. I know something fishy is going on in there but I just cant/dont want to pay a million $20 copays to find out. It sucks a big fatty.


Site Design By Designer Blogs